


I need you to keep your distance so I can come home again

by orphan_account



Category: All Elite Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: A lot of gross deep feelings and stuff like that, Angst, Jealously towards Seth, Mentions of Death, Open Ending, but they’ll always be connected somehow, comfort near the end?, they pretty much don’t like each other, unhealthy relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 08:35:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20793758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Seth Meets Moxley  after the death of Dean





	I need you to keep your distance so I can come home again

**Author's Note:**

> i needed to vent so I did it through Seth and Jon

“You sure you’ll be okay?” The words are ringing in Seth’s head for the millionth time. Roman’s face only held worry and concern but at the same time had a hint of understanding. Seth knows Roman will go with him if Seth allows but he also knows that Roman doesn’t want to go there. He doesn’t want to see Moxely and that’s okay. Seth can do this on his own, he’s always done it on his own. 

He doesn’t dare say that, he doesn’t want to make Roman feel worse. He already had been hesitant about leaving Seth here nonetheless by himself. He had insisted that he wouldn’t be by himself, he would be there too. Roman would click his tongue at that and change the subject. Roman’s always been the brains out of the two and maybe that’s why Seth can so easily brush that off. 

Its too late now he’s barely tumbling out of the rented car, tickets in his hand and a bag in the other. He needed to do this, if he’s gonna keep doing this he needs to settle it now. 

“ I’ll be okay, don’t worry too much okay?” He knows Roman can’t do that but it settles the guilt in his stomach when he nods back at him. He had one day to make everything right, as right as it can get. He grasp Roman’s hand one last time and let’s go, they don’t say goodbyes. Not when they both know that they’ll see each other the next day. 

They don’t say goodbye with so much blind trust that it hurts. 

Once Roman pulls away and he can no longer see the car, he looks through his bag. He pulls out sunglasses and a hat to hide his hair in. He had stolen the items from Roman earlier to make the situation much easier. The smell of Roman and the almost warmth of it felt like a sign to go on. 

Because here, he’s not Seth anymore, Seth doesn’t exist here. Neither does Roman or Becky or Finn or anyone that holds any comfort. He’s a nobody here and yet he feels like he’s everybody even when he dips his head away from fans. Not fans of him, old habits die hard and he sways away from anybody near him. He’s no longer being watched and the invisible shackles around his legs are gone. 

As much as he hates the shackles back home, they filled him with meaning. They became a part of him he hadn’t even noticed it till he arrived. He feels vulnerable in a place with hundreds of people. 

He’s Tyler Black again and nothing is right. 

——————————

A security guard lets him in. Not voluntary, he hands him a few hundreds and he easily lets him in. It almost scares him how in the flip of a dime someone can change their mind. He’s sure he doesn’t look the normal at all. 

His locker room is huge, the size of a hotel room if he was guessing. The floor is tiled dark brown, almost black while the walls are a contrast with pale white paint. It doesn’t fit him at all. He’s so used to never stopping, he’s used to so many colors he can’t even digest them. How can he even sit in the room for longer than a minute? 

Stories paint themselves on the walls while he waits. He hates it. The walls go from his happiest moments to his worst, even going to they’re worst moments. He shuts his eyes as he hears him getting closer. He knows his footstep by now, he hopes rumors don’t spread fast like they do back at home. He wants to surprise him even if he knows he won’t enjoy this surprise. 

“ What the fuck are you doing here, Rollins?”  
The voice hisses almost with a hint of uncertainty. The door is slammed shut and even being as old as he is, he can’t help but jump at the bang. It was now it never and he couldn’t keep going without at least trying with Jon. Even if Jon had to kick him out of his locker room at least he knows that he’s making an effort.

“ I heard you we’re looking for me” 

He says simply, he lays his bag down and he can hear the clink of his belt hitting the ground. He had refused to leave it at the hotel, he knew someone would manage to get their hands on it. But now hearing the clink of the metal against the silence felt suffocating. Almost as if it was teasing Jon in his lack of success next to him. 

Jon notices and his face gets angry, his hands are balled up and he almost wants Jon to throw a punch for a moment. Anything to make him feel alive, the room is too dead and bleak for his liking. 

“ That’s it? Why don’t you go back to your happy ending with everybody else” Jon growls at home and he knows that Jon doesn’t care. He knows he doesn’t care because he’s not even looking at him. He can see a hint of a smile on his lips almost as if he lives on making him feel horrible. Because truly? It doesn’t look like he misses him in his new life at all. 

Plenty of newer or even older talent that’s better than him in every way. He wants the control, the control to know that he matters in his life still. Even when he’s not thinking about him for one second. He wants him to hurt. He still plays the role anyway, he knows he can’t just agree with him. 

It’ll make him look worse and give Jon more reasons to want to, to, He’s not sure exactly what Jon wants from him but he knows it’s nothing good. Nothing good ever comes from Jon. He never wanted it to end up this way, he never could have thought it would end this way. He’s hit with the fact that Jon’s icy glare used to be directed at anyone who was rude to him. Now it’s directed only for him. 

“ You only want the guilt off your back”  
Moxley guessed him so easily. The guilt drove him here. After everything even months later guilt and the inability to let go has him here. He wishes he could forgive himself without begging for Dean. But he can’t, he’s never been that type of person.

He can never forgive himself and it makes him angry at everything.

“ I have nothing to feel guilty about Moxely and you know it” 

It’s all the words he’s always wanted to scream at him. He’s never even whispered them to himself and yet here is. He didn’t fucking know that everything would happen and home wouldn’t treat him well. He didn’t fucking know that all the words he said to Dean hit him like a bullet. He didn’t know at one point Dean became more jealous of his belts on his waist than at him. He didn’t fucking know.

Everyone always wants to blame him but he never even fucking did anything. He didn’t force him to stay, he didn’t cry when he left, he didn’t cry when he made him bleed, he didn’t cry when he had to land that chair on his back and he didn’t cry when he killed Dean. He never cried even when he wanted too. He never got the chance to tell Dean all the things he never got to say. 

He never even got the fucking chance to say goodbye. He mourns Dean whenever he sees the bud of cigarettes or when he sees plain blue jeans. He’ll never get the chance to say goodbye. How can he ever move on? 

He deserved a better goodbye. 

How can he possibly interact with someone that killed the last bit of Dean? He doesn’t know who he’s looking at anymore, he’s heard that Jon looks happier now yet everything is black for him. He wants to fucking shake Jon till he sees Dean, he wants to claw his fingers on Jon’s cheeks till he sees Dean again. He can taste the hint of iron in his mouth and it only drives him to do worse.

He wants to leave with blood dripping down his knuckles and the ghost of what could have been gone. 

“ Yeah, maybe you’re right, but you’re so fucking idiotic you still have the guilt right?” 

Moxley is grinning, it looks like everything Vince wanted out of Dean. That’s the type of person everyone wanted Dean to be. A selfish asshole who you can never trust. He can’t force his body to stay instead it works on its own, forcing him closer to Moxley. He can smell the mix of disgusting beer and bubble gum. 

The order is so bad he almost wants to step back and take a deep breath. The smell is nothing you can get used too fitting for Moxley. 

He always wished he could read Dean’s mind, everyone would always joke that he already could read Dean’s mind. When he stares at Moxley he can’t help but wonder how fucking wrong they were. In all honestly, he probably knew the least about Dean. He didn’t know Dean, Dean simply knew Seth. He let Seth think he knew Dean when truly he had no idea who Dean is. 

Moxley knows his guilt too well, he doesn’t have to feel guilty but he does anyway. After all when you’re ex-best friend has a break down, changes his identity and gets a new job without you noticing it for the longest time it does carry some guilt. Maybe Dean finally being gone was a sign for him to leave as he would have never left Dean without something like this happening. Yet something pulled him right back to him.

“ Shut up”  
He’s losing his temper, he knows that’s what Moxley wants. He wants him to scream horrible shit at him so when Moxley thinks back at all the horrible shit he did to him, it won’t feel so bad. Moxley knows what he’s doing to him and he doesn’t even second guess himself one bit. 

Every bit of confidence Dean has kept hidden is finally coming out with Moxley.

“ Excuse me?” 

His voiced is laced with something like smugness, he’s trying to be angry. He doesn’t know how he can read Moxley so easily and at this point he really wishes he couldn’t. He doesn’t want to know whoever Moxley is. He’s way less isolated than Dean but every step closer to him will cost you. 

The whole thing makes him furious, he wants Dean. He came here for Dean, knowing that Dean is dead and gone. He came here to be angry at someone for once. 

“ At least I didn’t give up”  
He doesn’t feel it at first, he noticed Moxley before anything else. He’s starring at his palm and he’s stepping away from him. Finally his face is blank and he doesn’t know if that’s better or worse. His face stings hard, it feels like lava is running freely on his face. If he focuses hard enough on the sting he’s sure he’ll pass out. 

He’s never taken a hit like this. He remembers the countless times he’s fought people twice his size and they’ll never compare to that punch on his cheek. He’s lost all the words he wanted to tell Moxley. All he can focus on is the situation at hand. 

“ Stop trying to save me”  
Moxley’s voice is blank and somehow that makes it make more sense. He hadn’t tried to save Moxley, he’s trying to save Dean. A Dean that’s not here anymore, he’s trying to grasp at what he can and that’s Moxley. 

He doesn’t want to save Moxley, he wants to grasp at the little pieces of Dean still there. But there is none. Even with the little sympathy Moxley has for him, he still forces him to see that Dean isn’t here anymore. 

“ There’s nothing left for me, over there and with you” 

He’s pretty sure that its suppose to hurt but it doesn’t. He’s just as sure about the fact that if Becky or Roman or Finn had said that to him, he would have been a mess. It makes him feel more comforted almost, as if telling him it’s okay to not know who this person is anymore. Then it hits him, Moxley doesn’t recognize him either. They’re strangers pulling at each other’s sleeves and following the other around. They had danced around each other but still managed to catch glimpses of each other every once a while. 

They’re nostalgia and troubles always lead the two back to each other. Truth be told, He’ll always have a part of him even if Dean is no longer there. They’ll always have those small weak moments where they will break and do something stupid to see the other. They’ll never officially get the peace they need. He’ll always avoid all the places him and Dean used to laugh in but they’ll come tumbling back every once in a while. 

He’s sure Moxley knows this too because he’s off to a space next to head. Everything is tense, Roman is gonna be back soon and the knots in his stomach loosen. He finally moved and grips his bag tighter, he gives Moxley a nod, he’s still starring off into space.

Dean’s not here anymore, he’s sure dean isn’t ever coming back but just in case before he leaves he unzips his bag and leaves one of his older shirts on Moxley’s chair. 

He’s sure Tyler Black isn’t coming back anymore but just in case he lets Moxley slip in a business card in his bag.


End file.
